5 Things that Hurt Your Confidence with Coach Trish

You have to have confidence in yourself or nobody else will. It’s the foundation to any success you may have in your life, so it’s no wonder that confidence is often called the most important quality a person can have. Confidence comes from self-esteem and self-respect. These two qualities are necessary to maintain a healthy level of confidence.

If you don’t feel good about yourself, then you won’t believe in yourself either and this will lead to low-confidence. So what are the top 5 things that hurt your confidence? On this Decide It’s Your Turn episode, Trish Blackwell joins Christina to increase your awareness of what to be mindful of when you’re trying to achieve your utmost confidence.

The cultivation of confidence and courage together, allow you to live a life that is extraordinary and you end up being an example of what’s possible to others. Keep a watchful eye on these 5 things and you’ll be able to better understand yourself and grow your confidence.

In this Decide It’s Your Turn episode, you will learn:

  • The 5 C’s you should watch out for when growing your confidence: Comparison, Complaining, Criticism, Cynicism and Complacency
  • Why your belief in yourself matters
  • Where confidence comes from
  • How to handle comparison and how to redirect your mindset

What Does It Mean to Be Confident?


When you are confident in yourself, it does not mean that you do not have bad days or that you do not have these beliefs that creep up on you. Overall, if you’re confident in who you are and your purpose on this planet, you can accomplish anything.


Confidence does not imply the absence of self-doubt. Even if you are only 51 percent confident, you are sufficient. That’s all it takes. You only need to believe in the majority of your thoughts. Then there is the 49 percent who have doubts, which is fine. All we need is a majority share. That’s how you win anything.

Lack of Confidence


One thing that prevents you from manifesting self-confidence is the belief that you lack the necessary skills. To counteract this, keep in mind that confidence is a skill that must be mastered, and you need to strengthen it. To put it simply, the 5 C’s that undermine our confidence are comparison, complaining, criticism, cynicism, and complacency.



We live in a culture where we are bombarded with comparison, even if we don’t realize it. One of the things that come with confidence is the ability to guard your mind. We must be wary of how we are assaulted by comparison. Let’s not make a big deal out of it. Let’s accept it as a natural part of life. It’s almost as if it’s to be expected.


All of these stories are made up by us. We’re comparing ourselves to perfection. We frequently compare to a timeline. Even to your own imagined, arbitrary timeline, it is the comparison that causes inadequacy and lack. To avoid this, say, “Okay, well, I’m having comparison thoughts” and leave it at that. This helps neutralizes the thoughts and stop them in their tracks.



Complaining is regarded as mental cancer. When you stop showing up in life, it’s as if you’re putting the brakes on your confidence. Complaining distracts us and creates a hostile atmosphere in our minds. If you’re positive, your confidence and courage muscles cannot thrive in a hostile environment. We don’t want to get into toxic positivity. The best course of action is to acknowledge that you’re complaining, allow the brain to accept it, but then move on.


When you’re driven and want to go live out your purpose, you’re not likely to be a complainer. But you’re probably upset because your results show that you’re not getting any closer to your goal. We don’t even consider that a complaint. But it’s as if that’s poison to your competence, as well as poison to your belief.



To attain significant levels of achievement, you must be tough on yourself at times. It’s tricky to walk between being tough and having ridiculously high standards of being the first to arrive and the last to depart while simultaneously being hypercritical. That is the critic’s criticism; the critical voice robs you of your freedom. It does this by maximizing what isn’t going well and minimizing what is. As a result, your brain is solely concerned with how poor you are, such as areas where you need to improve, rather than to recognize your achievements.



The skeptical voice is the one that makes us start and stop, and it’s the one that makes us genuinely motivated. As if you believe in yourself and then attempt, just to be discouraged and defeated. The cynical voice then says, “Well, I mean, you probably would have worked out anyway,” which we rationalize. Then we go back to playing tiny and taking a rest.


One of our two superpowers is that we can have terrible days, and things don’t always go as planned. Despite this, we can shout, cry, and have tantrums but leave no space for quitting. That’s the only sure key to success. Most people, however, refuse to believe this because they say to themselves, “Oh, they must know something we don’t.”


Do not let a bad day turn into a bad week, month, or year. Because it’s challenging to re-enter after that, and this is when your self-assurance suffers. This is where you don’t enjoy doing the small things consistently enough to transform into the big something over time.



Complacency in believing that good enough is good enough when greatness is within us. If you have a seed of potential planted in you, it is your moral obligation to steward it, water it, grow it, stretch it, let that thing bloom. Get that fruit out there and make a difference in the world.

About Trish Blackwell:

Trish Blackwell is an expert at empowering people to get past self-doubt, overcome self-limiting beliefs and perform at their highest levels. Confidence coach to Olympic athletes, Ironman champions, CEOs, high-achieving entrepreneurs, and cultural influencers, she has been featured by TLC, Entrepreneur and Elite Daily as one of the top confidence coaches in the world and is an active member on the Forbes Coaches Council. She specializes in helping high-achievers think with more power, clarity and belief through her podcasts, videos and books.


Website: https://www.trishblackwell.com/

FB: https://www.facebook.com/trishblackwellcoaching/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/trish_blackwell/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/trainerTRISH

Show notes for 5 Things that Hurt Your Confidence:

  • Have you heard about Decide It’s Your Turn™: The Network? It’s a network for women who want to start living their most purposeful and profitable life.
  • Are you ready to hire a confidence coach? Christina offers limited 1-on-1 coaching. See if it’s the right fit for you
  • Follow Christina on Instagram
  • Find Christina on Facebook
  • Prefer to Tweet? Follow us on Twitter
  • View More Content on Youtube
  • Hashtags: #justbe #livealifeyoulove

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure and give us a five star rating on iTunes and leave us a comment about what you’d like us to talk about that will help you realize that at any moment, any day, you too can decide, it’s your turn!